Yup...I made the decision tonight. I've decided to take Jonathan out of school and try the home management program.
I spoke to him this evening. Asked if it was ok if he stopped school and the was "yes".
It was the 2nd hardest decision I had to make. The first when we had to decide to let him have the feeding button.
Like I wrote to my friends in facebook ... I hope this decision will be a correct one.
I actually wanted to cancel tomorrow's meeting with the teacher. Ever since I received the letter from the school Principal, my heart has been heavy. I just felt that the letter (albeit the first paragraph about being of any assistance) could have been sent after the meeting and not before. I guess the place for another student was top priority. My initial idea was to sign the form and return it back. But I still had questions I needed to ask.
I didn't have the peace to take Jonathan out of school. Neither did I have the peace to bring him back. I've tried (maybe not hard enough) to bring him back. But it has been difficult. So I decided to take the road less stress and I pray that God will give me the peace and strength to start something that's more constructive for Jonathan.
And maybe when he's more ready and I sort out his health issue (that has been bugging me for the last couple of years), I will register him for school again.
I've been tearing because somehow I feel that I've given up something for Jonathan that might benefit him. But his health outweighs that.
And maybe after tomorrow's meeting I will feel better. And bringing him out for walks at the beach or mall during school days will no longer be guilt trips :)
In the meantime, he's currently a chair and mat potato with the TV and YouTube. And his answer to my question:
"Will you still be intelligent and smart even if you don't go to school?"